Recently, Our World in Data completed a survey of ten years to understand who most Americans spent their time with. The results were surprising and grounded in some hard facts. While the survey may have been done on Americans, the idea of spending time with certain types of people holds true for all of us globally. Some truths are simply hard to ignore – that we have our parents for a fixed time only, that children grow up way too quickly, that good friends last longer and that working with people you like makes the work better.
Long gone are the days of childhood when time was in abundance and could be used leisurely. In an era which is full of technological advancements, we humans are parallelly plagued with lifestyle diseases and mental health issues like anxiety. Our time has never been more in demand, with every task begging for a piece of our attention. We seem to be running against time to do the things we love and love the people we hold dear. A 10-year study has made it abundantly clear that whom we spend our time with makes us who we are.
Soulveda looks at some of the most important people with whom we spend time and share our life.
Time spent with parents
Spending time with family comes on top of the list for most of us and yet, we struggle to make the best of it due to our busy lifestyles. Indeed, we tend to have the most interesting relationship with our parents. Our birth givers raise us for the first two decades of our lives and yet, we seem to be in denial of the values and lessons learnt from them. For instance, we may have been told the value of money or education by our parents for years and years, but we tend to dismiss them. However, that learning comes back to us when we as adults take a big financial plunge or get that big professional break. In short, much of what we receive from our parents is taken for granted. And by the time we grow up and realise how golden their lessons are, things have already changed. Either our parents have grown really old or we have drifted apart.
The results shared by the survey emphasises on this. It states that spending time with family peaks at 20 and then declines sharply. This means after 20, we get precious little time to spend with them. To cherish these moments with them then seems to be of essence. So look for opportunities to visit your folks and double the value of the time spent by doing things you love as a family. Revisit happy memories and indulge in simple gestures like keeping in touch over the phone regularly. These things go a long way in maximising this beautiful relationship you have from birth.
Time spent with friends
Imagine the role of Hermione in Harry Potter’s life, Enid in Wednesday Addam’s life or Monica in Rachel Green’s life. Our friends are the family we choose, goes the popular saying. The world over, people speak the language of friendship. It is the single most powerful thing to know there is a person who gets you on a good day or bad. Who we spend our time with becomes truly glorious when the friends we make are genuine and mindful. Honest, smart, confident and kind people make for great friends who cheer and support us in our endeavours and chide us when needed. They are like a mirror that reflects our best version back to us.
Spending time with friends changes our lives for the better by inspiring us to do more and compete in a healthy manner. Having friends who are a bad influence make life worse. We tend to take rash or wrong decisions and give into peer pressure too much. According to the survey, time spent with friends peaks at 18 but sees a sharp decline as we age and have more responsibilities. So it makes perfect sense to have friendships that are deep and run the course in good times and bad. Learn to invest wisely.
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