Often, we come across situations where something unseemly happens to us and we feel like we cant get over it. Whether we felt our best friend did not respond when we needed her the most as a school goer or when we feel trapped or wronged in a relationship as a grown up, all of us experience betrayal, growing distance in relationships and expectations not being met. It could also be a situation like loss of wealth, not able to meet a career milestone or even loss of a loved one. Such things impact our mental health in the form of stress and anxiety and even depression in some cases.
Constant thoughts about not receiving enough love, support or facing loss can play on anyone’s mind heavily. If we keep nursing troubled thoughts, it leads to further loss of productivity, declined day-to-day functioning, spoiled mood and a negative impact on existing relationships. Every year, World Forgiveness Day is celebrated on July 7 as a reminder to choose ourselves and prioritise our mental health over any anger, grudge or resentment that we might be holding about others.
‘When you forgive, you heal, when you let go, you grow’, is a quote that beautifully emphasises the importance of forgiveness as well as letting go. For our own mental peace, stability and happiness, we need to forgive, even when the other person may not be apologetic in some cases. When you keep in mind the bigger picture, you forgive and let go to make way for calm, cheer, learning and growth.
Soulveda gives you a reminder to let go and improve your mental wellbeing as we celebrate World Forgiveness Day on July 7. These are some of the best practices in your journey of forgiveness and letting go.
Acceptance and mindfulness
Forgiveness is important because it is required to let go and embrace life as it comes. The roller coaster of life presents ups and downs for everyone. In good times, if we also remember that there could be days of despair, the journey becomes more balanced. When we start to accept life as it unfolds, we try to live that moment to the fullest, giving our best shot. This is mindfulness or the art of keeping ourselves focused on the present. It shows us that what has unfurled in the past cannot be revoked and what will unfold in the future cannot be predicted too.
“If it’s out of your hands, it deserves freedom from your mind too,” said Mississippi-based writer Ivan Nuru, inspired by the art of healing. When we free our mind from the thoughts that do not bring happiness, it is best to rest them and move forward.
Maintaining physical distance
If letting go is proving to be difficult, try maintaining a physical distance to move away from the situation or person that has caused you pain and trouble. Try this – bring back your mind to calm, start to heal yourself without any guilt and move away till the time you are ready and confident to participate again. This kind of self-care allows you to step away from a situation which may provoke you further while helping you let go of anger or resentment slowly but surely.
Self-compassion
When taking a step back, remind yourself to heal and consciously work towards healing. You might be blaming yourself for the loss. At such a time, practice self-compassion and first forgive yourself. Indulge in a self pep talk and reinforce positive belief in yourself.
It is said that one can’t pour from an empty cup. In order for us to take care of others, we have to first take care of ourselves. That means we have to show self compassion in a bid to bring in calm from the turmoil and lead with wisdom later.
Talking it out
When you are hurting, the first instinct may be to hide. You may not like to express or share your innermost thoughts with others for the fear of being judged or not understood well. Choosing to talk can be your step forward towards forgiveness of oneself and others. Remember to talk to someone who you trust or a professional expert, who can listen to you in a non-judgemental way and offer advise if you are finding it tough to forgive.
Once you have vented, it may become easy for you to forgive. Talking can even bring in a perspective that was lacking, helping shape your thinking in a better way.
Adopting a growth and gratitude mindset
On this journey of letting go, a growth mindset helps tremendously. A growth mindset is when you accept the situations that are stumbling blocks, learn from them and move forward. When you are able to process any adverse situation or response, you decide to forgive and let go and shape your path towards new learning and growth.
It is a fact that unless there are adversities, we cannot really transform into a better and more resilient person. Gratitude helps in this journey by making us thankful for every experience we have. Once we start to understand that life is about giving back, we embrace our past and move towards a healthier future of fulfilling our responsibilities.
FAQs
When is World Forgiveness Day celebrated?
Every year, World Forgiveness Day is celebrated on July 7.
What does World Forgiveness Day stand for?
This day is a reminder to choose ourselves and prioritise our mental health over any anger, grudge or resentment that we might be holding for others.
How mindfulness helps in letting go?
When we start to accept life as it unfolds, we try to live that moment to the fullest, giving our best shot. Mindfulness is keeping ourselves focused on the present. It is a practise that helps us understand that what has unfurled in the past cannot be revoked and what will unfold in the future cannot be predicted either.
How letting go helps in growth?
Letting go helps in our growth as we learn to accept the situations as what they truly are; stumbling blocks that one should learn from to move forward.